-I've been hearing the song Band on the Run by Wings a lot lately, ever since Saul got arrested. In stores, in the different cars I'm in, it's weird. I looked at the lyrics and I was like WOAH! cos it's about being in jail and then on the run. Is the Paul McCartney trying to tell me something?

-I found white spiders on mine and Kevin's front doorknobs on Tuesday. I think it was either Spam or Tako that told me they're good luck. I don't believe in luck but I understand signs that are supposed to be good.

-Monday night I had a dream that Saul's whole family was in my room, but my room was much bigger. We were watching TV and all the people who were involved in the case that were innocent were being set free. It was a big deal and those involved had a big press conference, all the inmates where in orange except for Saul, he was in dark blue. (Dark blue, blue + black: Negative philosophy of life. e.g. superstition or fearful form of religion. When fear (black) is mixed with blue, fear pollutes attitude to life.) I cried and cried because he was finally free and his family looked at me weird, then I realized he was right next to me on my bed. He consoled me and said, "Don't worry, it's all going to be alright. We'll be in Vegas soon, won't that be fun?"

Tuesday morning I got a letter from him saying he dreamed WE WERE IN VEGAS, he in a tux, me in a red dress (Meaning: Joy, sexuality, aggression, animal passion, fun.) We were losing money on the slots and wearing the same sleeping lion ring. WHAT???

Saul's dad was supposed to come with me to visit Saul today but he never called me and I couldn't get a hold of him. I dressed up really nice for him, curled my hair with my crappy iron, wore different make-up. Before I saw him I was having a panic attack and when he sat down and talked to me, he said he was having one, too. Weird. He said I looked beautiful, I told him he looked handsome. He does, each time I see him he's more handsome than before. He told me about how he's incredibly bored in there, he hasn't got any of my letters yet, he hopes he sees his bro before he gets shipped out, he wants magazines LOL, his court date coming up (Dec. 15th) and how his dad was trying to bail him out for Thanksgiving but it didn't happen. I couldn't stop crying near the end of our visit, I couldn't help it, I miss him so much. I haven't talked to him without a phone or touched him in 26 days and 12 hours. We pressed our hands against the glass and pretended to touch but we don't. It's so damn hard to be right in front of someone you can't quite get to, especially when you know they're not supposed to be there. Every time I see him I feel weaker without him but stronger for him. When we see each other without the phones, without the glass, without restrictions, when he's free, it's going to be unbelievably amazing. Before he left, he asked me to stand up so he could see the nice clothes I put on for him today. He smiled, blew me a kiss, walked away after looking back once and I walked away holding back tears. We're hoping that we find something new on his court day, hopefully he might be able to get out (wishful thinking) but if he doesn't I'm going to take pictures of myself all gothed out on Santa's lap :p He'll get a kick out of that. :D

I wanted to go straight home but I needed to look for suitable walking shoes because my non supportive Payless slip-ons aren't cutting it. As soon as I walked in the mall a guy tried to sell me some magazines. I was irritated, unfocused and distracted so I didn't really understand the words coming out of his mouth.

I walked around and found some really nice walking shoes. I also went to Torrid and raided their clearance racks. I got a nice dress for tomorrow and a cool corset for cheap. :) A guy stopped me to demonstrate a curling iron on me. He was nice enough, asked if I was married, kind of felt me up a bit. He did all my hair and tried to sell me the iron but I was like $100? No, sorry. Swear, he gave me a look and vibe like he was going to follow me to my car in the parking lot and beat me with the iron!!!!

It took me 20 minutes to find my car in the vast parking lot >.< I went home all grrr and left again to get some cheap chicken dinner. I ate dinner with my mom, dad came home with a free turkey his work gave him, mom put it in my bathtub to defrost. Note to self: take OUT my guest before showering!!!!! Kevin came by during his lunch, I made him a tasty samich and he molested the Squeaky Toy. :) We hung out and talked until he had to leave. I've been feeling weird around him, I don't know why and I wish I didn't cos I like hanging out with him.. I hope it goes away soon, I hate that feeling I get around him now. We watched Resident Evil: Extinction the other night. It wasn't really horrible like everyone said, I liked this one a LOT better than the last one.

Tomorrow: Turkey Day! Mom and I are going to Thanksgiving mass at 10am, then we're going to cook cook cook! Cooking Mama: Thanksgiving Edition! :p Yes, I'm lame. Very very lame. It's just my parents, bro and whoever else drops by. I imagine my bro's girlfriend will come by and Kevin's coming during his lunch. My grandparents might drop by, they said had they known we weren't going to my aunt's they would have come here LOL I don't blame them; LA to Chino on the 10 is a nightmare!!!!

Here's to tomorrow, the next day, and come what may.

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I'm okay...it just hurt a lot...