I'm on a MAC computer right now. I don't like it but I have to get used to it. Today's my first day back at school since my almost two week sabatical. Woo. I felt like a recovering alcoholic going back to the AA meetings cuz they'd done wrong when I walked in the classroom. Gotta get my ass in gear if I'm going to graduate on time. To be honest, I really don't want to do this anymore, I've found that what I'm about to get myself into is a lot more than I ever imagined it would be but I'm going to stick it out and do this all the way through because maybe in time this will lead me to where I need to be. I really love what I'm doing creativley but the technical aspect of it is horrifying to me.

Happy Ceaser Chavez Day! (or so I understand it to be...)

This Saturday I only work 4 fucking hours. 11am-3pm. Woo. Which means on Friday I can party hardy!!! Who wants to hang out??? Or do something? Eh? Eh? TELL ME DAMN IT!!!

If nothing else, on Friday I want to see Tako or at least talk to him. I told my parents that I'm thinking about getting with someone and my dad was like, "What fool you gonna get with?" LOL for my dad's ghetto talk. I told him it was Tako and he was like, "Well, that's why you date, to see what fool you want to be with" :p If my dad really didn't like Tako he would have told me straight out "I don't like the guy, mija, he's no good, you can do better" but he didn't. Mom seemed pleased, she's happy with anyone I'm with so long as I'm happy. Yay for mom.

I'm still not 100% sure but I'm a hell of a lot more wanting to be with him after this week. Yeah, it sucks that it had to come to that, but I already knew in my heart I wanted to be with Tako, I guess I just needed a little shake to realize how really good to me he is. I just need to tell him what I need to tell him and we'll take it from there I suppose. I don't know how he feels about me at this moment, maybe his feelings have changed over the week, maybe he doesn't feel the same about me anymore, maybe he wants to back off or just walk away, maybe he really wants me still and is waiting for me, I don't know. I have no way of communicating with him. Ak, this sucks! I need to buy that boy a cell phone. :p

I'm peeved at my parents right now for making me do all their travel arrangements so close to their departure date (it's a month from now almost exactly) and now airline ticket prices are up up up and they're not going to get any cheaper like they hope. Grrr...I'll deal. I just have to call the rental car place and the airlines and get them outta here!!!! PARTY!!!!!

I've been having a sweet tooth like mad. Like, MAD!!! Eating nothing but sugary junk. My belly's getting bigger and I'm breaking out a little. FUCK! >.< ARGH!!! But I'm still slimmer than before. And prettier, too! Hooray!

Highlight of the day: James called me sweetie this morning, poked me (physical contact!!! eeehhhh!) and gave me two of his fantastical hugs. Awe!!! I'm glad I'm past that akward high school-crush phase with him and I see him for who he is and he's still kick-ass. :D I like that guy a lot. His whole self, just a really great person to be around and hang around! WHOO!!!

Still thinking very very very hard about working where Lilli works. I'm very convinced but I still have my reservations big time. Let's see what happens.

*sigh* Angst, thy form today is love.

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this is gonna look different, I'm sure