For those who don't know, my bro and I are almost complete opposites. (despite both being virgos LOL) We don't really mesh well, especially since our mental problems both have made us different people. But he's been going through a rough time and so I decided to invite him along to get some frogurt (frozen yogurt) at the frogurt bar in the Puente Hills mall today. It's a bit of a drive but he wanted to get out of the house and I wanted to talk with him about what's bothering him. And srsly, dood, I wanted a frogurt really really badly.

Jer wanted to get out the house, so we talked and he was the radio DJ. We listened to a lot of rap/hiphop, I really like listening to that kind of music but I don't listen to it too often. Jer has a really cool ability to make up new, cleaver lyrics to songs. Even thought I was there to cheer him up, he made me laugh my ass off. He has amazing humour when he's in pain.

One of the funniest things he said went like this,

Jer: Were'd you learn how to drive? Swear, I oughtta slap you!
Me: Like you told the Snacat to slap me?
Jer: Yeah! I'm gonna get her a little pimp hat with a feather in it, too! But she'll probably get too distracted playing with the feather!

It was the in the moment kinda funny, he did hand movements and everything.

I got my fucking epic delishious frogurt (regular and green tea flavoured swirl with strawberries, kiwis, granola, almonds and cherries!!!!) Apparently Mr. Dick and Spam where there in the mall too but I left before they told me.

On the drive back, bro says, "What say you by ol' Jerry a Jamba Juice?" I said okay, we got there and he let me try out his mango drink, it was good! He said thank you for taking him out and stuff and we came home. That was our bonding time. I've been letting him hang out with me lately and he's been okay to be around, idk why but it's just been like that lately.

I'm not complaining; 5 years ago he was heavily into meth and being around him was unbearable. His mood swings were terrible, he was apathetic, abusive, destructive, he stole thousands from my parents and he made my life so miserable that I planned to kill myself. Things change, people change. He says he wants to go to WyoTech. That's something.

*sigh* He's still a pain in the ass a lot of times, has horrific mood swings and carries unspeakable pain that we both witness and received but he's still my brother and I try to be there for him. It's very hard, but it's what I do.

I'm totally burned out. I didn't realize until today. My mind is fried and my body is tired. I know I'm not going to be able to sleep for a while though. >.<

at least it's payday tomorrow.

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Why do we like to hurt so much?
Oh why do we like to hurt so much?