Happy Mother's Day to all those mothers and Mothers out there! :D Today I was supposed to call this one guy from New York that I met but I lost the number I was supposed to call him at, so I couldn't call him. :( I really wanted to talk to him, too. :'( But there will be more opportunities to talk to him. :) He's really cool. His name is Joey and his nickname is "The Word". He's from Albany, New York and he's really into music. He manages a band called Dead Lift, and they're really cool! (deadlift.com for mp3s of their songs. They're a cross between Rage Against the Machine and HED p.e.) I signed up on their forum as SwEeTsUrReNdEr. He looks like Tonzy but with Sauce's eyes, he even has the goate` thing going for him! Crazy, no?

I texted John all day today (como siempre) and he's worried about his grades. Poor baby. :( I don't feel like we're connected anymore, and I don't like not feeling connected. I'm worried that we'll break up but at the same time, I don't know what to feel about this whole deal.

In the morning, Thita, Auntie Lise and Silvia met me, mom, and dad at this one diner in La Puente. We talked about a little bit of everything and I played with Silvia. We talked to Thita about how we might be taking legal responsablility for Jordan because of his family situation. I wouldn't mind him as my brother. He already treats me like his sister. :) I washed the cats when I got home and took a nap. Little Brother's friends visited him and I was curious to know who it was (It was Butchie and his little brother, Adrian) but I didn't want to get up yet. I found out later who it was. I woke up when Little Brother and Jordan were doing yard work. (They did a fine job mowing our dirt.) Then when I waited for everyone to get ready to go to Nana's (dad's mom) I put on Kill Bill and we all ended up watching it again. Mom got more out of it this time around. We had a barbeque at Nana's and spent Mother's Day there. (Including Jordan) I wanted to buy some cigs on the way back home but I didn't. Tonzy called me today. I am so very nervouse for him and Mela. I am very nervous. You have no idea how nervous I am about them.I'm scared that they will do something they will regret later and that will be my fault because I introduced them. But at the same time, at least he's going to church. I'm becomming less and less enchanted with this whole situation. I really am. Tomorrow is an Edge meeting for everyone that's going to have the night for "Love Your Enemy". This is a really good chance for me to try and shine and make up for the other night that I totally bombed on. I still feel very bad about that night. I don't know what life has for me right now. Especially since there is so much to be afraid of right now. But I can't help but try and face it as best I can. I have to try... http://www.geocities.com/sweet_jane258