I had a heart-to-heart with someone last night that was really unexpected but I was glad to lend and ear. I'm glad people feel like they can talk to me and I'll listen. And Kevin and I talked for like, 3 hours about all kinds of things, from the really meaningful like our opposing strengths and how we help one another with them to the really silly like how if we had a child it would be the anti-christ and it was so great being able to know that I can still talk to him and we can be cool and alright with one another. Things are changing and that's okay, we're still some higher level of crazy friendship and we'll always have each other's backs and that's cool.

This morning I was uber talkative with people at work which is unlike me cos most of the time I'm very reserved at work. Which makes people think I'm weird. I called my mechanic while I took a walk around the block during lunch and he said my transmission is fine! YAY! And to pick up the car later. I was waiting for Saul to come but I ended up picking him up after work cos he got out of work late. No complaints. :) I was happy to see him.

We picked up mom so she could drive her van back to BP after I got my car. I didn't drive my car but an INCH away and I could still hear that fucking scraping sound. FUCK!!!! And the mechanics are closed on weekends so fuck. I'll get back to it on Monday. I'll have to take my mom's car to Tak's tomorrow.

Oh, and JOY!!! I HAVE ANOTHER WISDOM TOOTH GROWING IN MY FUCKING MOUTH!!!! WHY?????? WISDOM IS PAINFUL!!!!! >.< DO NOT WANT!!!! I seriously don't know if right now my body can handle anesthesia and surgery and recovery, I really really don't know.

While Saul and I drove back to BP, a certain notorious ex of mine called, bored...and horny. I put my phone on speaker only cos I didn't want it to be obvious I was on the phone cos of the hands-free thing. We couldn't fucking believe our ears, my ex was BEGGING me to have sex with him. His exact words were, "I'm crying out to you for sex, and you won't with me!" He knows that I'm celibate and I told him then and there I wouldn't have sex with him ever again and he said, "I'd have sex with you right now cos I'm horny." and I called him a hungry dog. The line that stuck with Saul most was ,"Not even a hand job?" I can't believe how fucking pathetic this guy is now. I used to respect him so much, he doesn't even have respect for himself.

I was UBER hungry so we went to Alberto's and got super nachos, Jamaica and Horchata, fucking yum! We ate in my back yard and talked until he had to leave. I didn't want him to fucking leave, I was sad without him today and I was so happy to be with him the time I was. In the car, we talked and I wanted to stay talking with him so much longer. I told him I didn't plan for things to be so spread out in time but I just was bombarded by so many things and I needed resolve inside myself if I was going to start seeing ANYONE seriously. I can feel something very strong inside myself for him and I still feel something holding me back but I need to be utterly resolved inside myself before anything more can grow. But I can't explain how in just one night I got to this point or why except that he stuck around and showed himself consistently. I don't deserve that in him but it was his choice to remain a presence in my life.

And I'm so very glad.

We're going to lunch tomorrow, and I'm going to the party and going to have fun! Possibly going to the beach with Saul and his friends on Sunday! I've been DYING to go to the beach! Monday I have to take my car back to the mechanic's. >.< damnit. And I have to make a dental appointment to see how much it'll cost to take the tooth out. Can't wait. For everything. woo. ^.^

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I'll never change, it's wrong
So go away
Everyone said she's not
Your kinda girl
I've tasted love, it burns
I'm so afraid
Everyone said