Friday: Left really late to see Sauli :( I hadn't connected with him on Thursday during our visit so I came Friday to see how I felt. I just need to go with a different mindset, I know this isn't going to last very long from now so I have to stop thinking ahead and enjoy what this situation has to offer now. I miss him so much, and I know he loves me a lot. He hasn't even now gotten the letter I sent which is sad, and I can't send him another one because he might get transferred soon. I'm still trying to find the insperado to write again. *sigh* When I came back, I hung with Mike to donate some of his father's old clothes to a church and shop at Walmart where I found the eyelet material for the skirt I needed for my cosplay. Of all the places...ugh. Went with the family to eat at Carrow's which was pretty delish. Waited for Matt to get off work, we went to Norm's and had a light dinner. And the brownie. Bigger than my head. With ice cream and whipped cream. OMGosh, swear, it was so good but we were both like waddling out the door afterward! We hung out, I totally spaced on bringing some stuff I wanted to show him. LOL I'm so spacey sometimes. Saturday: Slept all day cos I came home at 4am, took some meds for my allergies and slept. The day was very uninspiring except for that I got a call from Saul's dad to relay a message to Saul, then Saul's call. It's so good to hear my babe's voice. Mike came by to get the power adapter for the keyboard he borrowed before I left for Tako's. I got there late but it was okay since Yuichi and I got there around the same time and Arlene wasn't ready yet. We watched some really cool YouTube stuff and smoked, oi, I needed that ciggy. (Sorry, Matt, but I did!) I was the designated driver to a backyard gig. I haven't been to one since the one my bro threw in our neighbor's yard and the gang unit was called. O.O Good stuff. I was invited to two parties, one I couldn't make it to (But I have a gift for you, Johnny!) and the other I was better off not going to since there was going to be a lot of people I didn't know in an unfamiliar area where I know liquor would be. Not a good mix. I really wanted to see Tako, too, I missed him and the other time I tried to hang with him didn't pan out. I had a great time talking with them, it was nice. It was also there where my camera died again, not wanting to go past the welcome screen despite me switching the batteries. Ugh, I need to get a new one soon. We got to the gig and it was a LOT calmer than any of the BP ones I've been to, totally different crowd, but still a good random mix of people. I had to stay away from the view of where they were playing though cos there was a strobe light on the ENTIRE TIME. >.< (for those who don't know I'm photosensitive and am prone to convulsions if I stare at rapid flashing lights) Chuck had followed us to the gig, he was a trip to talk to while drunk. They where doing shots of SoCo and had a crazy beer bong and spiked punch, I was like woah! It was interesting to watch the intake and inebriation of everyone. Tako, Yuichi, and Chuck got pretty gone, Arlene partied pretty darn hardy, too. Tako got messed up in the pit, got his glasses stomped on and a nice cut on his nose that dripped blood. O.O I was so very glad I had a sober head to take them home, really glad! We had to carry some folk into my car, the best part of the night was when they were looking for my car: Drunk dood: "Is this the car?" (that they need to go in) Me: "Yeah" Drunk dood: "...are you her mom?" Me: "O.o...no." That was pretty awesome. We went to Tako's, the drunkies passed out and Tako and I ate Lunchables while we talked about this and that. I haven't had a good night like that in a while. Watching him eat weird concoctions of food, it was pretty funny! He made me promise that I'd get some sleep, I hate it when people tell me I have to stay somewhere or make me go someplace (I guess trauma from my previous relationships, it is horrible) but I understood he was looking out for me cos I do fall asleep on the road. After and hour of somewhat sleep, I woke up and I couldn't go back to sleep for two hours no matter how hard I tried. I started freaking out real bad, so I left. I was angry and hurt and crying on the way home, I knew it was because I tried to block out the fact that Mother's Day might be hard for me to handle this year. I was thinking a hundred thoughts in my head that night, driving and crying, thinking about slamming my car into the wall along the freeway between Pomona and Covina. About how much that would suck for my mom to have that news on mother's day. About the child I lost. About the father of that child. How I miss who he was but accept he will never be that way again. About Saul, how someday we'll have children of our own. How much better I'm taking this routine severe bought of depression, how I need to make it stop. Everything, happening at once in my brain. I was glad I got it out of my system by the time I got home. Sunday: I made a corsage for my mom out of her favourite flowers in the yard, even put glitter on them. It's what she said she wanted for mom's day. The flowers died before the morning came but she loved them anyway. I got dressed really nice for her for church, wore WHITE *gasp!* hehe, and went to Sunday mass, then I treated her to a litte breaky at a coffee shop. I came home and waited for Tako, Arlene and Yuichi to come over cos I accidentally drove off with Arlene's purse and Tako's hat. O.O They came and they stood for a while, it was really nice! They saw my new puppies, petted my big dogs, drank some water, it was nice. I don't know why but it really made my day cool that they came by. I got a call from someone I wasn't expecting, it was nice to hear from him but it's hard to talk to him sometimes cos it seems like he doesn't listen to me when I speak sometimes but oddly enough it's a saving grace. Mom didn't want to go anywhere or do anything after breaky, and we were supposed to go to my uncle's new house. When we didn't show, my grandparents came by! I was so happy to see them! My grandpa (aka The Colonel, we call him that cos he looks like Colonel Sanders from the KFC bucket :p) was uber sick last week and lost 10 lbs due to severe food poisoning. My grandma can't drive so it was good timing my uncle showed up at their house when it happened. They told me I look slimmer and they were proud I am going to school. My grandma cooed over the new little puppies, my grandpa doesn't like dogs. They were driving my cousin's new van, it was super roomy and super nice! It was an interesting day to talk to Matt, too, cos he would suggest something to eat or I would and we'd want it! LOL I got Subway after he did, I wanted ice cream after he said he wanted some! :p And I wanted sour gummy worms but he already had some gummy treats at the movies! I seemed to make my male friends irked at me when I talked on the phone today. :'( Sometimes I'm tired of trying to be amicable, it really doesn't pay off in the end with some people. I'm anticipating the day I can make another appointment to see Saul if he doesn't get transferred within the next two or three days. T_T meow This day was truly a blessing, I'm glad it didn't affect me as badly as I thought it would. I'm very blessed to have my mother and for all the mothers on earth and in heaven. I know it wasn't my time to be a mother yet, I'm still trying to cope with that, but it will be someday and it will be really wonderful. I love all the mothers in my life, especially my mum and grandmas <3 Happy Mother's Day to all the moms, soon to be, remembered and all the in between. Things are good. I'm glad they are. :) THIS COMING UP WEEKEND: Opeth concert and Renaissance Part 2!!! ^.^ I'm stoked! =D *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* "Where did you get those fire works?" "China Town!" "Of course you did"